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Saturday, March 31, 2007



"God grant us the serenity to accept the things
we cannot change,
courage to change the things we can,
and wisdom to know the difference."
`knowing the difference, how should i go about it?
the former or the later?
it's all about you.
sudden surge of "emo-ness".
tell me how for i aint know how. )):



p.s. my semi transparent luminous blue bear necklace.

deardiary.
12:06 PM


Friday, March 30, 2007

I've learnt. so much from the people around me, the series of shocking news that i've heard one after another. it's just...too much...far too overwhelming for me..

something really terrible happened exactly 1 week ago...and i'm still trying so hard to get over it....i was really really really upset and hurt bcos i didnt noe tt things wld really turned out to be so sour for bth of us... actually, i was kinda pissed as well...it's lyk he knew that things were going the wrong way...i mean...it was pretty easy to sense it...but didnt bother clearing it up earlier...causing so much misunderstandings...perhaps, he really didnt noe. no one has ever said such mean stuff to me except him, the one and only guy i've truly liked in sch. it was the meanest thing i've ever heard and the shockin news from dihui that he actually treats me lyk a little sister and at the same time, confused abt what he really wants. that nite, i didnt much care abt anything...the one and only question i had in mind was tt...."had he ever liked me b4?" tts all i was interested in. i wasnt interested if he cld promise me something or anything. all i wanted to noe was if he ever had feelings for me. i wld have accepted it if he really felt nth for the past 7 going 8mths..bt not bcos he cldnt promise me anything...cos i really dont need him to promise me anything. he said he didnt have tt kind of special feelings....question is...does he noes how he is feeling? one should always act according to how his/her heart feels instead of listening to what his/her brain thinks it is...is it not? and tt includes not listening to frens.. actually..i did lied to him. i told him that the feelings faded somewhere along the line and then it came back recently. actually, it's not. the fact is, the feelings i had for him was so intense that it didnt once faded......i'm so sry to lie. but i really didnt want you to know abt this. at least, it's ok now. i noe that you wun be reading my blog since u're hardly online these days. it doesnt matters already. i'm no longer impt to you...perhaps...never was there once tt i've ever crossed ur mind... i mean...i dunno....you didnt seem to be keen in smsing or even toking to me....maybe...you may even find me a bother for the past 8 mths.....

but now...it's all over. i jus wanna say that i nv regretted lyking you. it is through this hard and ardous process that have made me a much stronger person. at times, all i wanted was sum1 to be dere to share his thoughts with me be it happy, good or sad. when i'm with you.....i really have got lotsa things to say and share with you...but it doesnt cums out easily....i really dunno why either. i've got lotsa crazy plans to do with you when i'm with you instead of movies, movies and more movies....sumhow....i wasnt able to carry them out.........

right now....i swear i dunno what you're thinking abt....perhaps, i never knew. u are always keeping things to urself...u hardly share with me...and now i noe why u hardly did....bcos, to you, i m just a normal classmate that never once walked into ur life...oh man...tt sounds so upsetting, isnt it? aint too sure why, it seems so hard to control my tears these days. and as i'm typing this...they just roll dwn my cheeks...to tell the truth...the reason why i left the lep rm on wed for a short while was bcos....i almost wept in the lep rm..and i didnt wanna do so in his presence. so i took a stroll around the school b4 settling dwn. even now as i'm typing this, i know i still do like you despite knowing you were so mean to me...call me dumb...but yeah. i'm just pretending to the whole world but i cant bluff myself tt i really do and pretending to be happy when i'm in school. i'm so hurt. how can i possibly be happy?

right now, i'm trying my best to forgive and forget about what happened. that includes, leaving you out of my mind. yes, i may be forcing it out. but i've got to do it. i just had to do it. i've been carrying tt with me for the past 1 wk...still contemplating if i shd give it back to you...i dunno. i onli know tt i've got to let you go a long time ago....i kept having flashbacks these days about those happy times we shared....especially the very first time at the beach....and the code we once shared on msn...even as i'm trying to forget....those memories still lingers on....it's so tough....so difficult for me to bear....is it the same for you too? perhaps, it's not. you didnt even care. looking at you in school, it was lyk u were nonchalent...and perhaps relieved tt u have told me about it..........actually, do i really mean so little to you? of so little significance? well, i guessed that's the case. it was easy for you with not much of feelings attached, yet, it's so hard for me. damn, it's so painful. aye. i hate tears.

after so much stuff....lyk wad mr koh said....i hope tt i'm still "a pleasant girl with a sweet deposition to you" instead of other mean stuff.....bcos i'm just a simple girl that has been madly in love with you for so long...tts all. aye. i swear i hate tears. ))::

deardiary.
8:08 PM


Monday, March 12, 2007



i'm a HAPPY GIRL!!! X)






me and my dearie at smu rooftop! oops. where's eugene?







may i present to u my 2nd lover, BUBBLE TEA ICE CREAM! YAY!!!







p.s. i'm madly in love with ya! i love ya =P

deardiary.
1:15 AM


Tuesday, March 06, 2007

you hardly cared. or rather, never at all.

deardiary.
7:02 PM


.Thank you.


..:. je serai toujours autour de toi et tu ne pleuras jamais ..::

.Singer.



jiahui
18
020589
ex-tksian
tjc
24/06
DaCliQue

.Wishlist.


*a sweet-looking musical box =D
*an engraved ring xD



.She Listens.


When You're Gone- Avril Lavigne
What Hurts The Most- Rascal Flatts
Lips Of An Angel- Hinder
Be Without You- Mary J. Blige
Inconsolable- BSB
Over you- Chris Daughtry
One More Moment- Ronin
Why Don't You Kiss Her- Jesse McCartney
Here Without You- 3 Doors Down
That's When I Love You- Aslyn
Awake- Secondhand Serenade
It's Not Over- Secondhand Serenade
Only One- Yellowcard



Emo, acoustic, hard punk, rock, indie ((:


.Her Song.




Lily Allen- little...

.Audiences.


.WaiYin. .Eunice. .QiLing. .PeiFen. .Verena. .XinAn. .Rubayn. .JiaJie. .YiLiang. .June. .LingTing. .SiXuan. .DiHui. .XuanYun. .WaiKit. .Hanna. .WanDing. .KeeYann. .Yvonne. .JingHuang. .Anavil. .Ryan. .Mervyn. .Evadne. .CiFang. .YaQi. .Chubb. .Mayo. .Angeline. .24/06. .Gogetit. .Key Inc. .Glamourica.



.Articulate.






.Tracker.




.Memories.


  • May 2006
  • June 2006
  • July 2006
  • August 2006
  • September 2006
  • October 2006
  • November 2006
  • December 2006
  • January 2007
  • February 2007
  • March 2007
  • April 2007
  • May 2007
  • June 2007
  • July 2007
  • August 2007
  • September 2007
  • October 2007
  • November 2007
  • December 2007


  • .Credits.


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    Editor: %purplish.STEPS
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